Quote: "Requires a whole new way of thinking, though, because everything is governed by the system."
Well, that's on purpose, hence the prefix "Quick"
But I'm glad you like it! The next big update will give you the opportunity to either let QuickODE handle the complicated stuff or to tweak stuff on a lower level.
Quote: "If I set Physics.SetGravity( 0,0,0 ) my simulation doesn't move at all - i.e. the AddForce does nothing to the objects."
Oh, I wasn't even aware of that! I'll have to take a look into it, because it's not how it should be. You should be able to create a non-gravity environment. Give me some time to check it out.
Quote: "I can't GetLinearVelocity(), therefore I can't limit the speed of my objects."
Ok, that's another command that I would have to add. You can calculate the velocity on your own though, by subtracting the objects position before the physics update from the position after.