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Geek Culture / Game: Name 3 things YOU would do as a US President

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Mr Underhill
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Posted: 4th Nov 2004 23:23 Edited at: 4th Nov 2004 23:24
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With all the political posts running around, I thought I could start up a little political game.

All you have to do is list your political party of choice (real or made-up), your choice for Vice President (again, real or made-up), and your top 3 priorities as president (serious or funny, your choice).

Here's mine.
Political Party: Green Party
VP: Sam Gamgee (LOTR)
Priorities:
*Legalize Medicinal Pipeweed
*Reduce all taxes on all video game programmers to $0.
*Declare a Preemptive strike on Mordor, claiming Sauron was making a "One Ring of Mass Destruction".

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I mean.... not.. that i.... new that already.... i figured... maybe... CRUD! IM A NERD! -Ion Stream"
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Ian T
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 00:03 Edited at: 5th Nov 2004 00:04
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Oh, I'd be very unpopular among some people...

Libertarian

And assuming we're out of this messy war...

-Cut all funding from the UN
-Revamp the foreign aid system so it's not being outsourced, saving us money
-Cut taxes due to the massive amounts of cash we're no longer pointlessly losing

There's more, but it comes later ... mostly downsizing the government. A lot. And using the money for things taxpayer dollars should be used for.


Here we go again!
TRANSGRESS AND I SHALT BAN YE! (Just kidding...)
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Manticore Night
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 00:05
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I'd change the official language to french, Assasinate Bush. Tax the country dry, then go back to Canada!

It's amazing how much TV has raised us. (Bart Simpson)
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Chris K
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 00:35
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Quote: "taxpayer dollars"


What taxpayer dollars? I thought you were cutting them.
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Avan Madisen
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 00:44 Edited at: 5th Nov 2004 00:45
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Political Party: Blood Pack
VP: Christopher Lee
Priorities
) Make protests against violent video games (in any way shape or form) illegal.
) Ban all forms of censorship of DVD's and video games.
) Ban Christmas decorations prior to december 1st.

I don't suffer from insanity:

I enjoy every minute of it!
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Ian T
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 00:56
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Quote: "What taxpayer dollars? I thought you were cutting them."


Work it out... five hundred thousand minus five thousand is not (contrary to popular opinion!) zero. Shocking?


Here we go again!
TRANSGRESS AND I SHALT BAN YE! (Just kidding...)
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David T
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 01:01
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1) Nothing major
2) Build up stable economy
3) Build up publixc services

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Jimmy
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 01:30
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Party: Uber-Conservative
VP: Britney Spears

I'd show everyone my dance moves
I'd make it illegal to speak out against my dance moves
I'd start a "Homo-Camp" program that is just a fat camp, but for homosexuals, fat or not.


Remember, Jimmy still loves you.
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Teh Go0rfmeister
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 01:37
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the massive post i just typed out apparently has offensive language in it. ive spent 40 mins sifting through looking for this language trying to find it, so i've given up.

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Ian T
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 01:39
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Did it contain 'CMC' ?


Here we go again!
TRANSGRESS AND I SHALT BAN YE! (Just kidding...)
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David T
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 02:05
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I once had 'ishitting' as a variable name (is hitting). Took me ages to find that.

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Teh Go0rfmeister
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 02:16
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anyway this is for US president, which even the most informed of british people wouldnt have a clue about.

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Ian T
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 03:07
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Quote: " I once had 'ishitting' as a variable name (is hitting). Took me ages to find that.
"


Ditto


Here we go again!
TRANSGRESS AND I SHALT BAN YE! (Just kidding...)
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Cian Rice
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 03:12
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Me:
Party: The Otakus
VP: Kenshin Himura
3 Things:

Would require that at the first 50 minutes of a school day begins students must learn about all things anime.

The pldege of allegiance would officaly become the pledge of Xbox holiness.

The national anthem would no longer be The Star Spangeled Banner, but rather "Freak on a Leash" from Korn.

There is only one way to package shaolin: Shaolin Soccer...
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jrowe
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 03:19 Edited at: 5th Nov 2004 03:19
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Political Party

"Liberal Llamas"

I wouldn't want to be President of the US, so i'll have a Deputy Prime Minister: My fellow intergalactic donkey of love "Smoosh"



1. Ban comercial sponsorship of political parties
2. Put an actual DOCTOR in charge of the NHS.
3. Disband the armed forces and give the money to oxfam.


For Fathers and Sons who enjoy wholy spirits.
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Ian T
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 03:25
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Quote: "Disband the armed forces"





Here we go again!
TRANSGRESS AND I SHALT BAN YE! (Just kidding...)
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Teh Go0rfmeister
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 03:35
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ok to 1 and 2, but i dont understand number 3. who will put our fires out during the next strike?

anyway, i figured i could put what i typed in a .doc and attach it. check the attachment.

Attachments

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Damokles
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 03:39
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Here are the three things I would do (it has to be in this order) :

1. Close all frontiers, nothing/nobody gets out nor in.
2. Now we can drastically change the economics :

3. The flag will change, because it's only one community .... only one star now.



Original, isn't it ?

- Mind the gap -
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Teh Go0rfmeister
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 03:49
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Quote: "Close all frontiers, nothing/nobody gets out nor in."

you know why gorvernments arnt so strong on immigrants? becuase the immigrants generally make better citizens than the "natives".

eg: turks going into germany, the germans were ashamed to release the criminal census, because for the 2 murderers that were turkish, there were 5000 germans, yet everyone hates immigrants

Quote: "The state is considered to have unlimited money (acceptable, because all frontiers are closed)
Everyone has to work 4 hours for the state in a day.
Everyone gets education, health,food and a roof for free.
Those who want more, can work more for money and else."

wow- that actually sounds liek a form of communism that would work

Quote: "The flag will change, because it's only one community .... only one star now."

and when you land on mars will you put a flag which represents the world, designed by the world? seems kinda fascist that you go and put your own flag on the moon, even though you were the ones who landed, it kinda offends people as it kinda shows the moon now belonging to you, when it actually belongs to no-one.

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Ian T
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 03:51
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Quote: "wow- that actually sounds liek a form of communism that would work"


No, it's really more like fascism, which does 'work' for a little while at the cost of everyone's rights and liberties .


Here we go again!
TRANSGRESS AND I SHALT BAN YE! (Just kidding...)
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Damokles
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 04:01
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lol, El_Goorf. At first, I must admit, there was some humour in it
Well, my first statement was there to make the second one possible.
The second one was not really meant to get communism, but socialism.

My point was just to get the USA in the opposite direction

- Mind the gap -
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Ilya
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 05:26
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Party: Yo Mama
VP: Ilya(Yes, I'm presedent and vice presedent)

Things:

Take over the rest of the world.
Change school to "Job school", where I pick a job for you and you do it.
Cut off all the branches and make them this:

-Punishment

Like Judicial except guess who picks the judges...
Also, the only people there are the victim, the judge, and the accuser.
Punishments will be rised severly and if the judge wants to sentence a severe punishment(like death), they have to tell me and get my approval.
And there is to be no proof that somebody did something, proof = death for the person showing proof.

-Hitmen
Like Executive except it's just people who kill the bad dudes.
Armed with:

Choice of G11 or M240.
Heavy armor.
Walkie-talkie.
Each good person gets a heavy tank and a bomber jet.
AT4
Claymore
Helment

They walk around on the street like normal people.
They can either go through the Punishemnt branch or shoot someone on sight.

-LAW

This branch is like the Legislative branch except:

Meet only in one place and are chosen by me.
Are armed with Large Antitank Weapons because they're LAWs.
Need me to agree on a law before it's made.

And one more thing:
I would delete all stupid laws(endagered animal laws, driving laws, drug laws, ect).

Quote: "I've seen the word programming and I'm not sure what it means. Anybody please explain?"


Quote: "We shouldn't sacrifice the truth to preserve "balance"."
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Hamish McHaggis
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 06:09
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Froog - You had sh*t in your post. Could be why .

Isn't it? Wasn't it? Marvellous!
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Dazzag
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 06:14
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Funny, I thought immigrants were the backbone of our extreme low wage jobs (ie. all the stuff we didn't want to do). That and school kids plus art students of course.

Cheers

I am 99% probably lying in bed right now... so don't blame me for crappy typing
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Preston C
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 06:18
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Party: "Am whackadoodle, k?" Party
VP: Brandon Chaderton (My cousin, so if I screw something up, I can blame him, he's going to be a politician anyway)

What would I do?

1) Increase the standards for education in this dammed country. Face it, from what I can tell, there's gotta be only one really smart person out of every 15 jackasses. And while that may seem good to some people, I can't stand being around people who can only read at a third grade level in tenth grade, and can barely multiply 2 x 2. So, I'll up the standards, and if a person isn't smart enough by a certain point, we make them more useful, such as making them our new donkeys when our machinery can't plow the fields properly, or testing new medicines or what not on em.

2) Arm our armed forces better. Through several money making schemes, I'll have our forces armed properly, and armed better. I'll have new equipment researched, and soon we'd have a nice batch of well armed, well trained soldiers who actually make our opponents piss their pants at first glance.

3) Ban any lawsuits against video game/software companies. You raised your child incorrectly you idiots, that's why they ran around and shot people in the head with that 10-guage you never had properly stored in the first place. It's your fault, not a video games. Move along, and beat your kids once in a while to set em straight.

Cheers,
Preston


Because I Can Dammit!
Prayne de crabug ahm rinedere be-yogt iglo kes gron
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Dazzag
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 06:37 Edited at: 5th Nov 2004 06:38
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1. I would take over Sweden. If you are going to invade a country you may as well have one with loads of fit blondes
2. Make a law that makes Family guy illegal to be cancelled. Seing as it was the best american comedy series for years
3. Scap Microsoft and ban PCs (this is harsh as I am a programmer as a living), then use the money to fund a super-ZX spectrum that runs on a holographic screen. With rubber keys.... nostalgia is a wonderful thing...

Serious ones:-
1. Sort out Iraq fast, then get out of there. Don't know how, and have no easy ideas (so don't ask). Just have the target is all
2. Muck around with the car laws so some of the decent handling performance cars would be legal. Basically leaving me decent transport (which is actually on the cards in the next few years if things go a certain way...) that can go around corners Actually I heard Bill Gates already did this, or is that just an urban legend?
3. Be less arsey about the environment. Again, I'm not giving answers, just what I would like to do. Nothings easy basically

Cheers

I am 99% probably lying in bed right now... so don't blame me for crappy typing
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Teh Go0rfmeister
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 07:34
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hamish: where? me and jrowe spent ages looking through it

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Newbie Brogo
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 07:38
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Party: Elite Catz0rz
VP: Garfield

Laws;
Free cats to everyone.
All dogs die.
People give me lots of money for no apparent reason.
Do whatever, as long as I get my money.
No real rules, except you must have a cat, treat it well, and give me money......
If I don't get my money, I will explode your computer, which we all know is very important for one thing or another...... You shall surely die.


WooT!
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BearCDPOLD
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 08:02
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Party: None
VP: Maddox

1. Remove parties
2. Get rid of the electoral college and base everything on popular vote
3. Fund stem cell research

Crazy Donut Productions, Current Project: Project Starbuks
Sony stole our name!
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Dung Beetle
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 09:36
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1.) Execute all other males and all women over the age of 35.

I don't think that anything else is necessary...
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hyrichter
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 09:56
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@El_Goorf
Quote: ". the pound will go sh*t in a while anyway"




Do not click the red button
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Shadow Robert
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 10:00
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Well this seems to has oddly enough been discussed before; which the conclusion game that in order for me to become President, the constitution would need to amend that 'birthright' stuff OR could always make sure anyone who definitively knows my heritage just disappeared.

(from what I understand being a country leader that can be quite a simple feat)

Having only 3 things I can do though would be very hard, as there are alot of reforms I'd like to impliment.
Question is more, 'what would you do with the country in it's CURRENT state?'

I would probably first see about covering that dephicit, so Taxes would have to be raised. Only raising the tax for the 100K+ earners will make me unpopular with the rich, but what do I care; being president I'd be taxing myself too.
Would be worth it to make sure we can recoup cash.

I would also see about extending what HMO was, and see about redefining a medical system around what the NHS was 25 years ago. (prior to privatisation).

Last thing I would do, well this is a tough one to think about. Really the final campaign promise would have to be something popular; so that everyone will change thier opinion.

'Could legalise Canabis (with nice high tax rates, you wanna get high would cost ya ) ... but then the Evangelics would complain about that.'
'Could see about training our troops better, but then again that would cost precious tax dollars, and I doubt it would help if they've been turned into a peaceforce rather than a policeforce.'

I think what we'd be looking at is trying to provide something to encourage small business growth again in order to help lower unemployment and bring the value of a dollar back to it's 1.0/€ & 1.5£ indexes. Say a few tax cuts for them, or maybe a subsidised income to allow them to hire more staff if they are not earning say $1Mln per year.

This said i'm more likely to become Prime Minister of the UK, (and really look at our political system and it wouldn't be that hard heh), and if that was the case. I'd back the guy who'd want to abolish the armed forces
:: thinks about filling in the correct pledge to war with the UN against the US :: heh


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Lost in Thought
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 11:18
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#1 Anyone who tries to sue someone for anything remotely stupid (like: spilling coffee on yourself then sueing Mc D's, smoking cigaretes and then sueing tobacco companies, your kid kills someone so you blame video games and violent cartoons, someone takes your idea on a way to do anything on a computer and improves it so you sue them, or anything similarly stupid) you kill them and their lawyer. You can kill them quickly but the lawyer gets slow torture.

#2 Try to help evryone in the US by: Don't lower taxes. Instead find ways to cut back on spending and put it to use for the people in this country. Then once everyone gets straightned out and has jobs ... possibly see about lowering taxes. Note: alot of people work more than one job even though they only work one job. Like working 70 ours a week. Thats basically 2 jobs. So you limit each person to 40 hours and one job each (unless special circumstances require more money like a single mother with 3 kids because her husband died) because they won't need to work as much as the taxes would be helping them with certain things. Certain circumstances would require more help for certain individuals. Only working 1 job at 40 hours a week will create alot of jobs for unemployed or homeless people. Anyone who refuses to work is banished to be homeless in Hobokin, GA. People with special cases that doesn't allow them to work fully manual labor will be trained to do other jobs.

#3 Education needs fixing badly. People complain saying there kids spend too much time at school and too much time at home doing homework (I agree with the second part of that) when the time the have at school now is being wasted. We went over the same stuff from grade 7 to 12 pretty much just restudying the same things over and over each year. With just a few new additions to math each year. And guess what ... People still failed each year Whats even worse is that our grading system here is graded by: 50% test,25% classwork, 25% homework. So you could have a 100 classwork average, 100 homework average, and a 40 test average and still pass with a 70. Even though you failed the tests It should be 100% test average.
More and more I see kids coming home with notes saying go over these 2 chapters with him/her. That is BS. You can't tell me having a kid in school for 13 years @ 6 hours a day (subtracted for breaks and lunch) isn't enough time to teach them what they need to know to make it in the world. Thats around 14,000 hours to go from knowing only basic life functions (how to beg your parents for a toy) to at least being able to multiply and divide without a calculator Kids have chores that need to be done at home and outdoor exercise activities.

[Addition] No Language Arts / English was not my best subject as it is rarely used in this area. Sorry for the spelling/grammer.

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Ilya
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 11:22
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What I learn in school during 6 hours usially equals to nothing. Other times it can be learned in less than 30 minutes. And 99% of it, I won't use because I'm (hopefully) going to be a programmer or a CEO(and I can learn stuff on my own).

Quote: "I've seen the word programming and I'm not sure what it means. Anybody please explain?"


Quote: "We shouldn't sacrifice the truth to preserve "balance"."
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BearCDPOLD
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Posted: 5th Nov 2004 13:37
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School is not so much about learning stuff as doing stuff, getting recognized, showing off to college recruiters and HR people, and then using your fame to get power in the business world so you can pursue your own interests with a huge wad of cash in your pocket.

Crazy Donut Productions, Current Project: Project Starbuks
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Jeku
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Posted: 6th Nov 2004 04:52
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If I were Prime Minister of Canada:

- Reinstitute the death penalty for first-degree murder
- Resolve major differences with the U.S. President
- Drop all funding to the CBC (Canadian Broadcasting Corp.) and open up advertising, etc. to keep it fiscally responsible for itself

Those are just three at random. Three more:

- Cap the federal income tax at 30% so as keep the technology sector from leaving Canada for the U.S.
- Drop French as Canada's second official language. Quebec doesn't want to be part of Canada, anyway
- Implement a free University scholarship to anyone that can maintain high grades (maybe at least a 3.5 average GPA?)


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The Real 87
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Posted: 6th Nov 2004 14:20
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VP - him >
Party - Gamers United
3 Things...
*seal border
*lower taxes and give tax refunds
*increase fossile fuel burnage to more quikly bring about the next iceage and to purify the gene pool.

This is my counting program

do: print "87" : loop
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Peter H
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Posted: 6th Nov 2004 21:30
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1. Take over mexico then canada...then entire american continent
2. Take over Russia then China (Nukes may be involved)
3. Take over everythign else besides Australia (cause they are teh r0x0rz) nukes may be involved in this step also...

"We make the worst games in the universe."

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zircher
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Posted: 6th Nov 2004 23:20
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Tort reform, move troops from Europe to Mexican border, get health care under control primarily by reducing insurance and medication costs.

Generally pursue a conservative Libertarian path. [Contrary to what some folks believe, I'm not a Republican. I just consider them the lesser of two evils.]
--
TAZ

"Do you think it is wise to provoke him?" "It's what I do." -- Stargate SG-1
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Neofish
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Posted: 6th Nov 2004 23:27
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Political Party: Raven's Party
VP: Me
Priorities:
Abolish politics
Abolish religion
and most importantly: Abolish polls like this

[center]:: Architectonic 2.0 ::
[center]
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Manticore Night
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Posted: 7th Nov 2004 01:12
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Quote: "- Drop French as Canada's second official language. Quebec doesn't want to be part of Canada, anyway "
TUE LE MAUDITE ANGLOPHONE DE L'ENFER!!!! Translation(for stupid anglophones(j/k)): KILL THE DAM ANGLOPHONE FROM HELL!!!!!

It's amazing how much TV has raised us. (Bart Simpson)
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Damokles
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Posted: 7th Nov 2004 02:06
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Please, Manticore. Calm your temper.

- Mind the gap -
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Jeku
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Posted: 7th Nov 2004 04:45
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Quote: "KILL THE DAM ANGLOPHONE FROM HELL!!!!!"


* My point reaffirmed


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