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Geek Culture / WHO IS THE BETTER PROGRAMMER

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DarkPhyber
21
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Joined: 5th Dec 2002
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Posted: 8th Jan 2003 16:43
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Jesus and Satan have an argument as to who is the better programmer. This goes on for a few hours until they agree to hold a contest with God as the judge.
They set themselves before their computers and begin. They type furiously for several lines of code streaming up the screen. Seconds before the end of the competition, a bolt of lightning strikes, taking out the electricity.
Moments later, the power is restored, and God announces that the contest is over. He asks Satan to show what he had come up with. Satan is visibly upset, and cries, "I have nothing! I lost it all when the power went out."
"Very well, then." said God, "Let us see it Jesus fared any better."
Jesus entered a command, and the screen came to life in vivid display, the voices of an angelic choir poured forth from the speakers.
Satan was astonished and stuttered, "But how? I lost everything, yet Jesus` program is intact! How did he do it?"
God chuckled and replied, "Jesus saves."
-Whats ur freaking point??-
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actarus
22
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Joined: 29th Aug 2002
Location: 32 Light Years away
Posted: 8th Jan 2003 17:15
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Me

Oh,I though you said the worst!! hehe

Just remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving
And revolving at nine hundred miles an hour!
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indi
22
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Joined: 26th Aug 2002
Location: Earth, Brisbane, Australia
Posted: 8th Jan 2003 18:52
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does god have a

pc mac sun or SGI or he has some massive emulation hardware monster.

me thinks his hard drive is fairly large to say the least

http://www.lunarpixel.com

http://www.lunarpixel.com/dt/
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DarkPhyber
21
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Posted: 8th Jan 2003 19:41
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lol

-Whats ur freaking point??-
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rapscaLLion
22
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Joined: 29th Aug 2002
Location: Canada
Posted: 8th Jan 2003 22:51
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*chuckle*
Haven't they ever heard of backup batterys?

Alex Wanuch
aka rapscaLLion
Kousen Dev Progress >> Currently Working On Editors
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indi
22
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Joined: 26th Aug 2002
Location: Earth, Brisbane, Australia
Posted: 8th Jan 2003 23:17
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hell.net has to upgrade the UPS then.

http://www.lunarpixel.com

http://www.lunarpixel.com/dt/
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rapscaLLion
22
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Location: Canada
Posted: 8th Jan 2003 23:36
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Alex Wanuch
aka rapscaLLion
Kousen Dev Progress >> Currently Working On Editors
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MrDuck
21
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Joined: 16th Feb 2003
Location: - Please Select -
Posted: 18th Feb 2003 12:59
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Greets...

That was really good...and funny...

Mr. Duck.............

Quack!
(Daffy Duck and the Aflac Duck are no relation)
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LLX
21
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Joined: 17th Feb 2003
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Posted: 18th Feb 2003 15:29
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um this is obvious
who coded a enire univeres, created true AI in the form of ADAM.EXE and EVE.EXE who not only managed to violate the programing but when they were banished to the trash bin they survived DELETION triived and developed the ability to share code and complie other EXE from their own data, all while the Word AI Script continued to evolve around them.

Answer that and you know the answer.

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Blazer
22
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Joined: 22nd Oct 2002
Location: United States
Posted: 19th Feb 2003 02:49
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wow, if God really did code the world, he's got a lot of pixels electrons and protons must be 100's of pixles

As I walk through the vally of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil.
- Psalms 23:4
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Shadow Robert
22
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Joined: 22nd Sep 2002
Location: Hertfordshire, England
Posted: 19th Feb 2003 04:42
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i reckon he cheated it ... the electrons and protrons are just made up of thousands of quarks which arn't real atoms just virtual atoms - and he's just using the same small universe memory space over and over again with some clever pointers

but then again, carmack could probably do a better job
lmao

Tsu'va Oni Ni Jyuuko Fiori Sei Tau!
One block follows the suit ... the whole suit of blocks is the path ... what have you found?
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LLX
21
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Posted: 19th Feb 2003 05:38
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yu know *looks around nerviously* its not a good idea for a AI to insult their programer, all they have to do is delete your Interact.world() function

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Shadow Robert
22
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Location: Hertfordshire, England
Posted: 19th Feb 2003 06:04
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(^_^) ahh thats the problem when the programmers good... the AI rises up and exceeds him mwhwhahaaa

Tsu'va Oni Ni Jyuuko Fiori Sei Tau!
One block follows the suit ... the whole suit of blocks is the path ... what have you found?
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frostyrootbeer
21
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Joined: 23rd Dec 2002
Location: Afghanistan
Posted: 19th Feb 2003 06:19
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God programs in assembly

equation for any multiplayer fps
the best weapon in the game = "noob cannon"
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LLX
21
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Posted: 19th Feb 2003 13:41
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but remember *looks about shifty* the programer god can just erase the world program and then we all go.

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Shadow Robert
22
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Location: Hertfordshire, England
Posted: 19th Feb 2003 19:39
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thats a good point... lets hope he defrags and scandiscs atleast once a week - i'd hate to slow down, or even have a rival universe plan a bug and need to be reformatted

Tsu'va Oni Ni Jyuuko Fiori Sei Tau!
One block follows the suit ... the whole suit of blocks is the path ... what have you found?
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PiratSS
22
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Joined: 18th Oct 2002
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Posted: 19th Feb 2003 20:42
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I am so good, I know how to double click on DB Icon!!!

And then(UNBELIAVABLE!) I could Press F5 To get black screen!

I mean, I spent 4 Years of Computer Science, and look at that! I could do a black screen!

People will soon kill,

Is it illegal?



Current Project:
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LLX
21
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Joined: 17th Feb 2003
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Posted: 20th Feb 2003 19:21
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Thats why GOD coded in such AIs as Norton, for the sub fucion inside the "coputer" function, Medics.Class for when AI get corupted and need to be repaired, MEchanics.Class for AI Controled Objects, and Poltician.Class to maintail order in the system, but aparently a rivial EXE has infected ....or insertedthe Bush.President.USA.AI.Script as his script has released the following print comand some cycles() ago.

"Reguardless of what the Inspectors.class find this will not come to a Peaceful.resulution()"

(actual quote, altered slightly)

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Rob K
Retired Moderator
22
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Joined: 10th Sep 2002
Location: Surrey, United Kingdom
Posted: 20th Feb 2003 21:25
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yes a nasty trojan that.

Actually I think whoever did program this world is pretty pathetic - look at all the bugs in the Human Relationships code.

For example, the Girlfriend32.dll file keeps trying to force the Adam.exe file to use the replacement Fiance32.dll file. After that Adam.exe has to use the Wife32.dll which consumes vast amounts of memory and resources. It is also impossible to downgrade the Wife32.dll file (which quickly becomes very bloated) and if you try and opt for the faster, more slick mistress32.dll then the two conflict and Adam.exe is shut down. It is ridiculous!

NOBODY has a forum name as stupid as Darth Shader. I do.
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darkCorridor
21
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Joined: 27th Jan 2003
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Posted: 20th Feb 2003 22:35
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lol .. if i was not so lazy i would makea ai game with adam.exe and all that lol

[br]mikey
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Shadow Robert
22
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Joined: 22nd Sep 2002
Location: Hertfordshire, England
Posted: 21st Feb 2003 00:48
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i had that exact same problem with upgrading my GirlFriend 2.9 to Wife 3.0 software, there was a clause in the software which when used in conjunction with DogWalker 1.6 it would at first not detect the useage, but newer and newer updates gave it better port access - it wasn't long before a complete system crash and back to using Basic Bacholer 4.0 ... which though alot of my friends enjoy, personally i enjoyed more of the automatic services in Wife 3.0 ... suchas Cook, Clean, Nookie, etc...

i did try what a friend said and attempt to downgrade to Girlfriend 2.9 but even after deleting all traces of DogWalker 1.6 the Wife 3.0 program failed to uninstall, leaving me with an unwipeable sectors on my hard disk and a support team that appear to have made the situation worse as i have to give half my HDD space i get each month to the Wife 3.0 program even though it is now owned by someone else

Tsu'va Oni Ni Jyuuko Fiori Sei Tau!
One block follows the suit ... the whole suit of blocks is the path ... what have you found?
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Kanzure
21
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Joined: 19th Feb 2003
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Posted: 21st Feb 2003 01:41
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Deep inside of the hard drive of god....A program.20 lines of code. World.EXE..With the words "Winner of 20 line Dark Basic Pro contest 2 times in a row"

Makes you wonder..

~Morph
Owner of MultiCode.NET.
I know HTML, PHP, Perl, JavaScript, VBScript, Visual Basic, C/C++, QBasic, YaBasic, and now Dark Basic/Pro...
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indi
22
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Joined: 26th Aug 2002
Location: Earth, Brisbane, Australia
Posted: 21st Feb 2003 02:19
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evolution vs special creation

science and supreme beings

oil and water.

http://www.lunarpixel.com

http://www.lunarpixel.com/dt/
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darkCorridor
21
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Joined: 27th Jan 2003
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Posted: 21st Feb 2003 12:35
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hmm... gives me an idea - *sends a virus to god's PC. Mission: Delete File 'school.exe' and expand weekend.dat*

[br]mikey
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