Honestly. 3ds Max is the 2nd easiest 3d program ive ever used. Have you converted the instances half to mesh? and after that you have to select one hald and attach the other so they are in the same edit mesh. After this grab all of the middle vertexes and weld them all together. If you do/did this, everything should go as planned.
Oh but i have heard that putting 3ds format in DBC has some difficulties and unexpected problems. So if there isnt anything wrong with your mesh in 3ds Max try converting the object to .x format then put it into DBC
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