After months in developement, we can proudly announcing the AI system...
AI is designed to be an Artificial Interrogator, designed to make using a computer (availiable for the PC, Smartphone and Mobile 5.0) as much of a chore and pain as possible without it killing you*.
As one of the
late testers described the system : "It would make you wish you were never born..."
And the reason for this system - well, as you all known (and especially Americans) - people are getting fatter, and not doing enough exercise. They are vegging out in front of the TV, computer or hamburger and not wanting to do anything apart from watch TV, play on the computer or eat a hamburger.
AI will solve these problems, forcing any sentient being within a couple of hundred metres to go outside, into the fresh air+ and away from the computer.
AI is designed to make you uncomfortable, unwanted, unloved and downright undesirable. It will criticise everything you do, and moan aboit everything you dont do. It will make your life unbearable and may be unsustainable. It will make the torture as described in
1984 seem like a picnic; You would gladly wall yourself up in a Wicker Man; and if a great white shark appeared you would be more than eager to smother yourself in blood, just to get away from the system. And all this to make you better, both physically and mentally.
If all goes well, we hope to install the system in TV's, Freeview boxes, microwaves, and especially in mobile phones.
And what would you pay for such a system, painfully developed in DBPro ? Well, for the first few months the hardware & software combination will cost just £75 (the hardware contains a battery backed system to make sure the computer is always running, and is powered by a quasi-perpetual motion system).
* Optional extra
+ Only in the UK or Canada - and then only in the Northern Territories...
