I'm fairly new to all of this, but I do know that there is only one certain way to export to DB from Milkshape, and that is by going to the "Export: DirectX(JT)" (it is near the bottom of the export list), using the "x" file format (obviously), and...
for ~DBC~,
1. UNCLICKING "Right Handed"
2. Setting the Position Scaling to "1"
3. Activating the "Exclude Options" tab (click it)
4. Set the animation time factor to 1
5. Use "Direct X Retained Mode"... and use "Binary" I can find no difference between this and the other modes, other than file size.
For ~DBP~
1. Do all the above things for DBC, only select "DirectX Skin and Bones" from the bottom menu, also using binary and make sure you also select "S&B Templates".
Hope that helps!